I'm not a fan of shopping malls, but when I happen to find myself stuck in one, I try to find ways to make it fun. Recently, I grew bored while waiting for a friend to try on a bunch of clothes, so I wandered toward the food court to see if I could find anything interesting to document. I meandered past Cinnabon, Hot Dog on a Stick and was finally drawn toward Uncle Wong's Chinese Kitchen (name changed to protect my innocence). There were a dozen vats of food on display, all of it deep fried and covered in sticky sauce. You really couldn't tell one dish from the other and for some reason, this fact amused me. A worker shoves a fried thing impaled with a toothpick toward my face and demands, "Try a sample!" No thanks! I felt like a photo needed to be taken so I pointed my lens toward the Sweet and Sour Pork (or similar item) and snapped a shot. BIG mistake.
The guy behind the counter starts dramatically and LOUDLY freaking out. He's screaming at me in high-pitched gasps and waving a serving spoon full of General Chow's Delight (or similar item) around in the air. "NOOOOOOO! Camera not allowed!! Not allowed!!!" He's turning red, his face twisted with anger....I start to giggle. I hear "NOOOOO! No No NOOOO!" barking behind me as I calmly walk away. I figured I better not take any more pictures, so I sit down at one of the tables and begin to sketching Angry Uncle Wong's Guy while waiting for my friend to join me.
About 10 minutes of peace pass and suddenly I'm aware of a hovering presence. I look up and see what appears to be a pimple-faced kid dressed as a mall cop standing on a Segway. I think he looks cute, but realize it's a little early for Halloween. "Excuse me ma'am," he warbles, "it's against mall policy to take photos of Chinese food." Everyone in the food court is now staring at me. The Angry Uncle Wong's Guy who yelled at me comes running up to my table. "That's her," he screams, "she's the one!!" I burst out laughing. The very unthreatening mall cop explains that the mall has "had lots of problems with people taking pictures" and that they "have to watch out for terrorists". Angry Uncle Wong's Guy demands I delete the offending photo. I sass back and tell them I already deleted it, but not before I emailed it to my operatives over at the secret underground bunker. Sparky the Mall Cop laughed at my quip, but Angry Uncle Wong's Guy was still furious. I wanted to snap a photo of them as they scolded me, but didn't want to push my luck. I hate when I wimp out. Medium: Ink sketch in moleskine, digital color.
